


Hate to Love You (Castiel x Reader)

by sparklingcas



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Language, Oral Sex, Smut, a little bit of violence between castiel and the reader, castiel x reader - Freeform, castiel/reader - Freeform, public sexual act, sprinkle of angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-27
Updated: 2017-04-30
Packaged: 2018-10-24 15:39:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10744659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sparklingcas/pseuds/sparklingcas
Summary: You hate Castiel. Or at least, you tell yourself you do. In turn, Castiel feels the same about you. Exactly the same.





	1. Part One

Dean sat in the library, staring at his beer on the table; trying to focus on anything except his two best friends on either side of the room, arguing. **  
**

“And what would you have done, _flappy bird_?” you questioned, gripping the back of one of the chairs at the table, digging your nails into the wood.

“I would have-” Castiel began, but you interrupted him, his hands balling up into fists.

“Stabbed him with your shiny knife or-”

“ _Guys!_ ” Dean shouted. His voice radiating off of the walls of the library, causing you to jump and bringing Cas’ attention to him.

“ _You’ve been at this for an hour and a half-_ ” he continued, still shouting- “one of you leave or both of you or go fuck.” He gripped onto his beer and stood up, looking between you and the angel, whose face was contorted with anger. The use of the name _flappy bird_ being one of the many names you called him that enraged him.

You bit your inner cheeks as you spun on your heels and stormed off. You weren’t going to let Castiel ruin your night. You had plans to go out with Sam and Dean, who were for once going somewhere _nice_ –thanks to you, and not a smelly, moldy, dingy tavern. You were already ready, you just needed to change.

As you walked down the hallway to your room, you banged on Sam’s door, reminding him that it was almost time to go. You walked the rest of the way to your room and slammed the door behind you.

You let out a breath of frustration when you thought about what that damned angel was probably saying about you to Dean. He was probably asking if he could kill you, or if the boys were ever going to kick you out of the bunker. But for all you knew the angel didn’t hate you at all.

You shook your head at the thought. You weren’t letting anything ruin this night, you were going to the club, and you were going to get laid.

You walked over and started ripping through your closet, looking for what you were going to wear for the evening; when you’d found the perfect dress, you pulled it out and went over to your dresser, kicking off your shoes and taking your shirt off before switching bras. You hardly ever got to wear the dark blue lacy one. The one that pushed your boobs up high enough to catch anyone’s attention.

You slid your jeans off along with your panties, not bothering to put on another pair before stepping into your dress. It was different than the one you usually wore; you tended to opt for your red dress, but tonight, you put on your hip-hugging black dress, which _just_ covered your ass, and it played a nice roll in boosting your breasts up even higher. You stepped into one of two pairs of heels that you owned, the black ones with the red soles.

You heard Dean call from the library that they were ready, and you couldn’t have been more excited. You threw on some mascara before letting your long y/h/c down to flow over your shoulders and down your back. For you, this was going all out.

“ _Coming!_ ” you shouted as you opened your door. You tried to shove your phone..somewhere, but you had no pockets and carrying a purse was something you just didn’t do. You’d have to let Sam hang onto it for you or something.

You were looking down at yourself, picking hairs and fuzzies off of your dress that had been put up for such a long time as you walked into the war room to meet Sam and Dean. Whenever they went silent, you finally looked up. The two brothers, along with Castiel, were ogling at you like a bunch of lost puppies. You put your hand on your hip and shot them a look.

“I know, none of you have ever seen my hair down and my tits out. Now let’s go.” you motioned to the door as you started to make your way up the stairs, tugging the back of your dress down and and turning back, noticing that Castiel was wearing a pair of jeans, different dress shoes, and a black button down shirt. His hair was even a little bit ruffled.

You stopped at the top of the stairs, Sam and Dean just beginning to walk up them as you opened your mouth to speak- “He’s not coming.”

“That’s not up to you.” Castiel snapped back.

You looked directly behind you, making eye contact with Dean- “Aren’t you gonna do something?!”

“Nope. We’re goin’ out, and you two are sittin’ in the back seat together too.” Dean said with a smirk on his face. You opened the door before looking back and raising your eyebrows at Sam for help, who only held his hands up in defense, not wanting to get involved. You really hated Castiel, and no one was helping.

You felt your blood boil as you stomped outside and tried to make it to the passenger’s seat before Dean gave you the _don’t fuck with me_ look.

You shot the same look right back at him as you opened the back door to the impala and sat down. You stared silently out the window as everyone else got into the car, and just feeling the seat dip slightly when Castiel sat down made you angry.

You could practically feel him staring at you as Dean pulled away, the four of you now stuck in the car until you arrived at the club.

“Will you quit fucking staring at me?” you snapped, crossing your legs and leaning back in the seat.

He tilted his head at you and squinted his eyes- “You know you’d be a lot more likeable if you weren’t a bitch.” he snapped back, Dean shooting him a look in the rearview mirror; he knew you hated each other but Castiel didn’t often swear, and he was worried things could get serious.

You slowly turned your head, making eye contact with him before you uncrossed your legs and jabbed your heel at his thigh. You’d uncrossed your arms to readjust whenever Castiel grabbed your wrist and pulled your towards him, his other hand gripping onto your hair and pulling the back of your head down to his lap so that you were face to face with him.

“Watch yourself.” He growled as his grip around your wrist tightened. You ignored the pain you began to feel there as Dean slammed on the breaks in the middle of the road and spun around in his seat.

“ _Cas! Let her go. Y/N, don’t fucking touch him_. God dammit-” Dean continued mumbling obscenities to himself- “Sam, you drive. Cas, get up front.”

Castiel looked down at you for a moment and before shoving you off of him, his eyes wandered down to your cleavage and his pants tightened ever so slightly. Once he let you go, you sat up and Dean slid in next to you as Cas got out. The rest of the drive was completely silent as you dug daggers into the back of Castiel’s head with your eyes.

–

When you’d arrived at the club thirty minutes later, your face lit up. All tension in the impala had been forgotten as you hopped out of the car and skipped to the entrance, the man at the door smiling and letting you in without any questions. _Perks of the push-up bra and a nice ass_ , you thought to yourself.   

You didn’t care that you hadn’t waited for Sam, Dean, or Cas; you weren’t really worried about them anyway. You only cared about whoever you were going home with tonight.

The music was loud and the the club was dark, just the way you liked it. There were lots of people and you immediately began looking around. After a few moments of taking in your surroundings, you saw Sam, Dean, and Cas. You decided to walk over to them, only for your path to be blocked by a tall, well built man whose face you couldn’t see that well, but his smile captured you; and judging by his height, he was packing what you were looking for.

He leaned down closer to your ear so that you could hear him, “Need a drink?”  
  
“From you? Absolutely!” you said back to him as you linked your arm around his and walked with him towards the bar.

After several minutes of flirting, a couple of drinks, and when the boys nowhere to be seen, you allowed the man, whose name you now knew as Jack, to lead you out onto the dance floor. You got really into it, letting him grip onto your hips as you grinded against his hard on. Your back was against his chest as his hand slid down the front of your thigh and up under your dress. You didn’t care who could see. You looked up, leaning your head against his chest and allowing him to kiss you. His fingers had found your panty-less sex and the tip of his finger had been just teasing at your clit as a hand grabbed your wrist and pulled you away.

You couldn’t recognize the dark figure in front of you who was dragging you away from the rare fun time that you got.

“Hey!” you shouted, trying to get the person’s attention. But as you looked down at your wrist where he was pulling, you recognized the same feeling from earlier.

You were being pulled along by Castiel.


	2. Part Two

You began prying at his hand with your free one the second you recognized him, ignoring the need to pull the bottom of your dress down. Cas had you in a back hallway with no one else around before he let you go, only to change the positioning of his hands, now grabbing both of your wrists and throwing you against the wall. The hallway was equally as dark as the dance floor and the music was still loud, so your chances of getting help went out the window.

“Cas, _fuck off_!” you shouted at him, trying to wiggle from his grip and to fix your dress.

“Oh, so you _can_ call me by my name.” he said sarcastically as he let your wrists go so you could adjust your dress.

“Don’t get used to it, feathers.”

Castiel put his arm across the top of your chest and backed you up into the wall again, the lower half of his body pressing into you- “Why do you hate me so much?” his brows furrowed as he asked.

His face was just a hair’s distance from yours as your heart pounded with rage. You wanted to throw something, to scream, to kill something. Your breathing became laboured as you thought about how badly you want to hurt Castiel; even if you didn’t truly want to hurt him.

You opened your mouth to give him a reason, but nothing came out.

“You don’t even know why,” he smirked, “I should just let you go back out there and let yourself get fucked in front of hundreds of people-” he pressed himself against you even more, if that was even possible- “that’s what you want, isn’t it?”

“Why do you fucking care?” you questioned him. You felt his cock harden against your thigh as you snapped, your eyes involuntarily closing as a sudden pulse of desire coursed through you.

You took a deep breath before finally pushing him off of you, and ignoring the fact that you probably should’ve worn panties as you were even wetter now than you were before. You turned to look at him one last time before walking away and going back out to the dance floor to hopefully find Dean, and tell him that you were ready to go. Cas stood there, glaring at you, and if you weren’t mistaken, you thought you saw a little bit of hurt in his eyes.

It wasn’t a surprise that Castiel had ruined your night. And you weren’t going to let that guy _–Jack–_ fuck you in front of everyone. You would’ve at least went to the bathroom.

When you’d found Dean, who was sitting at the bar and making googly eyes at a pretty blonde woman a few feet away, you walked right up to him and tugged on his shirt- “I’m ready to go!”

He leaned down so that he didn’t have to yell- “Well we’re not so, start walkin’. I’m not worrying about you and Cas’ drama right now.”

You nearly screamed before turning around and storming off outside. You were completely enraged; almost enough to begin crying. So be it then, you would walk. At least it wasn’t cold outside. But taking into consideration the distance between the club and the bunker, you decided you would just sit in the impala.

You opened the back door, got in and laid down on the seat. You propped your feet up on the door with your knees bent, not caring if your heels scratched the panel. Dean could get over it.

You played with your hair for awhile, braiding a small strand and taking deep breaths whenever the door your feet had been propped up on opened. You sat up immediately to be met face to face with Cas.

“Can you leave me alone?” you snapped as you sat up, ready to kick him with your heel again.

“Tell my why you’re so awful to me all the time.” Now he was just bickering with you, and two could play at that game.

“You don’t treat me much better.” You drew your legs closed as he started climbing into the back seat. Your blood was boiling again at this point.

“Because you’re a complete bitch towards me!” Castiel shouted; and you froze from how loud his voice had actually gotten. Castiel had had enough with everything, he didn’t like to argue, and he didn’t like fighting – especially with you.

“ _I-_ ” you began, only to be cut off by Castiel.

“You _what?_ ” he scoffed.

Your heart began pounding as you scooted over to the other side of the seat; Castiel sitting down and closing the door. You just decided to go back to sitting how you were on the ride there; your legs and arms crossed as you looked out the window.

“You _know_ why, Castiel.” you said calmly, even though you felt as though you were about to blow up.

Slowly looking over at him, you noticed the sympathetic look in his eyes. Your parents had been turned into werewolves, and Castiel was the one that killed them while on a hunt with Sam and Dean. You watched it happen, and hated him ever since.

“ _I-_ ” he began, but it was you who cut him off this time.

“You’re _what_ , sorry?” you scoffed, just as he had only moments ago, “ _yeah_ , me too.”

You looked back out the window, your heart stopping when you felt Cas wrap his hand around your wrist, this time much gentler. His hand slid down and tried intertwining with yours but you pulled it away.

You side-eyed him, unable to ignore the throbbing between your legs. This time Castiel reached down and grabbed one of your ankles and pulled you so that you slid down on the seat, your dress riding up as he positioned himself on top of you. You could’ve stopped him if you wanted, but you _did not_ want him to stop.

He leaned down, his lips nearly brushing yours as he pressed his clothed erection against your exposed, soaked folds; drawing a whimper from you.

“You say that you hate me, but I bet you’d take my cock right now without complaint-” he growled, grinding his hips and causing his jeans to rub against his clit- “wouldn’t you?”

You smiled, letting out a low laugh as his hand slid between your bodies and began teasing along your folds, drawing out a moan from you this time.

You didn’t want to admit it, but you wanted him, bad. You hated him with every fiber of your being…or so, you thought. You tried to tell yourself that you wouldn’t care if he was dead, but truth be told you had no idea what you felt.

Castiel crashed his lips into yours and pushed a finger into your entrance, curling his finger up and making your squirm. You moaned into his mouth, allowing his tongue to roll over yours as he slid another finger into you, your hands threaded into his hair and gripped tightly. Just as you were about to come on his fingers, Dean pounded on the window.

“ _Hey! Not in my car_!” he shouted before walking over to the driver’s side door and getting in, and Sam getting in the passenger’s seat. You quickly sat up started pulling your dress down.

“You think you two can keep it in your pants until we get home?” Dean turned around to look between you and Cas, as you both adjusted yourselves, your faces completely flushed.

“I’m not taking it out of my pants even when we get home.” you snapped, trying to keep up your bitchy persona; Glaring at Cas as you settled back into your seat.

He shook his head at you but you just turned away from him, your feelings for him more unclear now than ever; but there were butterflies in your stomach as you kicked the back of the front seat for Dean to go.

It was the longest car ride of your life. What was supposed to be a thirty minute drive felt like it lasted hours. And now Sam and Dean knew? You weren’t embarrassed to be caught, you weren’t the easily embarrassed type; you just wanted to get back to the bunker and fuck Castiel’s brain out.

And judging by the way he kept glancing at you, he heard every dirty thought you had.

Things like, _“Imagine how my lips will look wrapped around your cock,”_ and _“what if I just spread my legs and fucked myself?”_ had him shifting in his seat, the inappropriate prayers for him pouring from your mind.

But you still ended every prayer with, _“I still hate you.”_ and an uncomfortable pang in your chest.


	3. Part Three

After sitting in complete silence and listening to Sam and Dean chat in the front seat for what felt like hours, Dean finally pulled up in the bunker garage.

You’d opened the door and gotten out before he even had the car in park and made your way back to your room. You were slightly disappointed when Castiel didn’t follow you, but maybe you’d be better off at getting yourself anyway. You’d just thought that all of those dirty prayers would egg him on. The “I hate you” ones probably ruined everything.

You made your way to your bedroom and closed the door behind you, wishing that you had more of a buzz. You’d only gotten the chance to have two drinks before Cas pulled you away from your potential one night stand. Now you just felt..different – still sexually frustrated, but different. Also not quite as angry as you were before. You almost felt calm.

Just as you began unzipping your dress, there was a knock at the door; and you were pretty sure that it was Castiel, so you let the top of your dress fall so that your bra was exposed, but the dress stayed on, clinging to your hips.

You took a deep breath and cracked the door slightly before opening it all the way to make sure it was in fact Cas. When you saw him standing there, you allowed him to walk in and close the door before you stood there in front of him, with nothing to say.

Your heels made you almost as tall as tall as he was, so you were easily able to keep direct eye contact with him as you reached behind your back and unhooked your bra. As you let the garment slide off of your shoulders and drop to the floor, Castiel’s eyes moved down, locking onto your bare chest.

His eyes lifted back up to make eye contact again, and you slowly stepped out of your dress, sliding it down over your hips and letting pool at your feet, exposing the rest of your body to Castiel. He bit his bottom lip as you kicked your heels off.

You stood there in silence for a moment, both of you contemplating your true feelings for one another. You stepped back until your knees hit your bed and sat down. Your eyes stayed glued to the seraph as he began unbuttoning his shirt, kicking his shoes off and undoing his pants.

Once he was completely naked, he stood there, waiting for your permission. When your eyes wandered down to his erection, he stepped forward. You scooted yourself up on the bed and spread your legs enough for Castiel to lay over you, the head of his cock just brushing your folds as he pressed his lips to yours.

This kiss was soft and passionate, a major change from how you were with each other earlier. Much to your surprise, you found your hands gently caressing his face as his soft lips moved in sync with yours. You licked his bottom lip, sucking it into your mouth as your hands slid down around his back, his arms sliding underneath you and flipping both of you over, so that you were now on top of him.

You broke off the kiss for a moment and rested your forehead against his. His hands moved to hold onto your hips, and you let out a low moan as you moved your hips and rubbed your wet folds along the shaft of his cock.

Castiel groaned as you continued the slow, torturous movement. His hands moved down to grip onto your ass, causing you to smile. You crashed your lips into his, pressing them against his hard, and allowed him to lift your ass up, and guide the tip of his cock to your entrance.

The moment you slowly sunk down onto him, you whimpered. He slowly filled you, stretching you as your lips stilled against each other. Once he was fully seated inside of you, he sat up, wrapping his arms around you.

Your chests were flush against each other as you began to slowly move up and down on him, your breathing becoming more and more erratic each time his cock brushed against your g-spot. You broke apart from his lips and rested your forehead against his again, his eyes wandering down and taking in the sight of your naked body. He watched as his cock disappeared inside of you every time you lowered back down onto him and moved his hands to your waist.

He looked up at you. Your eyes were closed as your head fell back, the familiar warming in your lower belly beginning to stir. He heard your thoughts, he felt your desires, your pain; and he wanted you to let it all go.

“ _Y/N-_ ” he groaned, causing you to open your eyes and look at him, “Say it.”

You watched him for a moment, gazing into his blue eyes. Your heart pounding in your chest from both arousal, and the confession you were about to make. Castiel began to lean forward, moving his legs and resting you down on your back so that your head was at the foot of the bed.

He kissed you and let out a low growl as he began thrusting into you slowly- “Say it.”

“ _I love you, Castiel._ ” Tears immediately coming to surface as you thought of all the pain that you’d pinned on him. The pain that wasn’t truly his fault. He was never the reason your family turned, he’d only been trying to protect you.It had been nearly three years since that night, and as you confessed, Castiel began thrusting slightly faster.

“ _I love you-_ ” you cried out, Castiel capturing your lips with his and bringing a hand to your face to wipe your tears away.

“I’ve been waiting for a long time to hear you say that,” he whispered against your lips, “ _I love you too-_ ” His thrusting slowed to a stop for a moment so that he could look into your shimmering y/e/c eyes- “I’ve loved you from the moment I first saw you.”

He leaned down, his lips brushing against yours before teasing them down your neck and sending chills through your body. He pressed his lips to the base of your neck, slowly beginning to thrust into you again as his mouth worked on your neck.

After a moment of you teetering on the edge of release, Castiel pulled out of you. You whined slightly, until two fingers replaced his cock. He kissed down your chest, his free hand gently kneading one of your breasts on the way down. Your hips bucked as his fingers inside of you curled up before moving in a scissoring motion, making you squirm as your pussy throbbed for release.

Castiel’s mouth eventually reached your pubic bone, his tongue darting out, just enough to tease at the top of your folds. “Cas-” you moaned, breathing heavily as his fingers continued to tease you, and his mouth moved down to the apex of your thigh, kissing and biting gently.

Castiel groaned as he finally worked his way to your dripping sex, lapping at your clit and drawing out a shout from you; you were already so close and you needed to come.

Cas’ tongue circled your clit, sucking it into his mouth and then pulling his fingers out of you and delving his tongue into your entrance. You had to remind yourself to breathe as he licked a long stripe up your sex; and then the instant contact of his tongue back on your clit triggered your orgasm.

He sat up slowly once you were finished, his face glistening with your slick. You held up your hand and motioned your index finger in a slow come hither motion, to which he responded with grabbing your ankles and sliding you closer to him on the bed where he sat on his knees. He changed his stance as he held the back of your knees up and sank his cock back into your entrance. The new angle instantly causing all of your blood to rush to your head.

He looked at you for approval as he began thrusting into you slowly. You nodded as you cried out from the feeling of his length filling you to the brim once again. He pulled out almost all the way before thrusting back into you hard, and then did it again. Within seconds he was fucking you into the mattress as hard and fast as he could’ve and you were desperately searching for something to grab onto.

“ _Uhh-Y/N-_ ” he moaned as his hips stuttered and his grip on your legs tightened.You held your breath as Castiel came, his cock buried deep inside of you and triggering your second orgasm.

Your back arched off the bed as Cas stilled inside of you, your body trembling as your orgasm pulsed through you. When you came down from your high, Castiel fell forward and caught himself with his arms on either side of you and placed a soft kiss to your lips. Your hands moved up to hold his face as he pulled out of you and fell to your side, your lips still glue to his.

You didn’t want to stop kissing him. You needed to feel his lips moving against yours, and you needed to taste his tongue, tangled with your own.

He wrapped his arms around you as you laid on your side, still hell bent on kissing him.

He had to place his hand on your cheek and pull you away slightly to get your attention. You whined whenever he put even the smallest amount of distance between you.

Castiel caressed your cheek as you laid there, your head resting on his shoulder as you looked up at him.

“I didn’t always hate you-” you started, “I just…needed something – someone to blame.”

Cas looked at you and smiled- “I know, love..It’s okay-” his hand moved down your back and he pulled you into his chest- “Please, just…don’t call me flappy bird anymore.”

You let out a laugh as your head rested against his chest, fatigue beginning to take over, “How about I just call you my boyfriend?”

Castiel kissed the top of your head before pulling you in even tighter- “I’d like that.”

For the first time you fell asleep to the sound of Castiel’s heartbeat, and you wouldn’t have had it any other way.


End file.
